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    Sep 11, 2016

    Four Keys for Practicing Faith

    Passage: Deuteronomy 6:4-9

    Speaker: Rev. Vivian McCarthy, Pastor

    Category: Faith Formation

    Keywords: children, christian formation, faith, youth

    From very early in faith history people of faith knew that it was essential to be reminded of the faithfulness and love of God. In today’s scripture lesson, the Israelites are nearing the Promised Land, and they are reminded to always remember the greatest commandment by reciting it again and again – even marking their doorposts and wearing symbols with the holy words: Hear O Israel: the Lord you God is One Lord. You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind and with all your strength!

    When our daughter Erin was in elementary school, we started playing a game when we went to the grocery store.  This was in the olden days when we had to take cash or a checkbook to the store to pay for the groceries, and honestly, I was always afraid that I would put more groceries in my cart than I had money in my wallet!

    So, I began challenging Erin to keep a tally of what our groceries cost – in her head.  She got so good that it wasn’t long before she could tell me the total within just a few pennies, usually because she didn’t add the tax.  You all know what she does for a living – right?  Yes, she’s a math teacher.  She teaches calculus and does everything she can to challenge her students to use their math skills every day.

    We often laugh about those grocery store challenges, and both of us believe that the grocery puzzle game is what made her decide to teach math!

    What is it that you are doing with your children and grandchildren to shape them for their whole lives?  And especially to shape a lifelong faith that will support and nourish them, deeply relying on the love of God for strength and courage and comfort?

    In his book Faith Formation 2020: Designing the Future of Faith Formation, John Roberto says that there are 2 foundational communities that shape every child’s faith:  the home and the church.  It is in those 2 communities where children watch and learn from those around them.  They learn what is important.  They learn the beloved stories and songs.  They learn what the community values are.  They learn who God is, what God means to the community, and what God means for them.  Roberto writes: 

    These are the two critical contexts for the faith formation of children and youth in America today.  Christian Smith observes, ‘If formation in faith does not happen there, it will – with rare exceptions – not happen anywhere.’ (Smith, 286)[1]

    Just a week or so ago, I was having conversations with a couple of moms in our congregation.  One of them told me that every day her 3-year-old asks to sing one of the VBS songs at the top of his lungs with the CD on his way to day care.  Another mom told me that a song came on the radio and when her 7-year-old heard it, she began to sing.  Mom said, “where did you learn this song” (thinking it was a bit grown up for her little gal who usually plays with the Legos and coloring pages in the Parlor during worship!)  She looked at her mother and said, “Mooooooom, we sing it in church!”

    If we begin with the assumption that it takes both home and church to help our children and youth to have and practice faith, it seems to me that the day that we start our Sunday School full-tilt for the season is a good day to offer a few thoughts on how we can make faith a daily part of our children’s lives.

    What we do as parents and as other members of the children’s faith family makes an impression – usually a lasting impression.  So, what are some things that we can do to help our children to have a healthy, vital faith life?

    First of all, I hope that every parent and grandparent and any other adult that has an opportunity, will share their own faith with the young people – the highs and lows, the struggles and doubts and the deeply holy moments.  Not in a “you should” kind of way, but in a “this is how my faith helps me” kind of way.  Share your struggles and how you have felt God near. 

    Just recently I had the great privilege to share a few moments with one of our young adults who is not here very often and has more or less stopped practicing faith all together.  This young adult asked me about heaven and eternal life and what I really thought.  I took a risk and shared some of my deep thoughts – as well as how my faith supports me when we suffer tragedy or loss.  I recommended a book that spoke to some of our conversation, and to my surprise she followed up to get the title and author so she could read it.

    Several weeks later, that same young adult saw me again and told me that the fact that I sometimes struggle with “Sunday School answers” was important to her and helped her with her faith struggle.  She said that she was reading the book and that the honesty and openness of our conversation were very important to her.  It made her feel that her own questions were valid faith questions.  It was a deeply holy encounter!

    Attached to this sermon on the website is a new resource.  I am hoping that it won’t be only useful for families with children and youth but can be used by all of our faith family with a little creativity.  In his book, Roberto suggests a very simple approach to helping our families practice faith.  He recommends four keys that come from an organization called Vibrant Faith Ministries.  I am going to share with you a few sentences from Roberto about each key.

    The first key is Caring Conversation.  Christian values and faith are passed on to the next generation through supportive conversation.  Listening and responding to the daily concerns of children and youth makes it easier to have meaningful conversations regarding the love of God, and are ways to express God’s love to others.  Hearing their parents’ “faith stories” is one of the most important influences on the faith of children and teenagers.[2]

    A fairly easy approach to Caring Conversation is for every family member to share the highs and lows of their day.  Listen to the children and be sure to share your own highs and lows – and if you live alone, find someone with whom you can have these conversations every day.  As you listen, remember that asking clarifying questions or for more detail shows that you are really listening and interested in what your child or teen has to say.

    Key #2 is Family Devotions and Prayer.  The Christian faith shapes the whole of our lives and involves a lifetime of study, reflection, and prayer.  Family devotions provide a way to learn more about the Bible and Christian tradition as a family, and apply the teachings to daily life as a follower of Jesus Christ.  This understanding of a devotional life includes, but is not limited to, public worship, bedtime prayers, Bible reading and study, table grace, evening and morning prayers, and praying alone at any time of the day or night.[3]

    Each week, for the next few months at least, we will offer some simple home practices for devotions and prayer:  a Bible verse and a question for each day and a table grace.  The questions about the Bible reading are intended to allow each member of the family to come to their own conclusions about the reading.  There are no right or wrong answers.

    Key #3 is Family Rituals and Traditions.  Families identify themselves and tell their family stories through daily routines, celebrations, and rituals.  Family rituals can take many forms.[4]

    It is my hope as your pastor that all of our families will be intentional about seeing that some of those rituals and traditions are shaped by our faith life – and our faith life together.  So, for this week, the suggestion in our guide is to consider making the HoeDown a Faith Tradition for your family!

    And finally, Key #4 is Family Service.  I know that I’m not the only mom who had her kids putting their socks in the drawer from the time they were pretty young.  I have a picture of Dennis washing the dishes on Mother’s Day when he was 2 – without my asking him!  Family service to care for others is essential if we are to build the value of loving neighbor.  There are many family service opportunities available through our church family’s life and through the wider faith family in mission.  Each week, the Faith Practice sheet will offer some suggestions – not all requiring a trip to church.  For example, this week’s suggestion is to find an elderly neighbor who could use some help getting the garbage out to the curb.

    The important thing about family service is that you help your children understand why you are doing this:  to keep the commandment to love our neighbor because God loves us.  There is a difference, friends between volunteerism and Christian service – the difference is in the motivation – the why.

    Several years ago, one of my aunts died, and my cousin asked me to do her funeral.  As I thought about my Aunt Lynn and what in the world I would say, I was somewhat overwhelmed by the realization of how my parents and very close extended family provided a foundation for me, my sisters and our cousins – a base that included attention to the kinds of things these Four Keys can offer for our families.  Several of my cousins told me later that they were glad I mentioned that foundation because it made them realize how deeply grateful they were for parents and other important adults in our family who shared their innermost selves with us and gave us a foundation that made it possible for us to risk and achieve and trust – to know that we were loved by our earthly family and by God without reserve or condition.  I pray for that kind of foundation for every one of our children and youth every day!

    [1] Faith Formation 2020: Designing the Future of Faith Formation, by John Roberto.  Copyright © 2010 LifelongFaith Associates.  Page 133-134.

    [2] Ibid, page 135

    [3] Ibid.

    [4] Ibid.