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    Jul 23, 2017

    Practicing Gratitude

    Practicing Gratitude

    Passage: Colossians 3:12-17

    Speaker: Pat Botelle, Lay Speaker

    Keywords: gratitude

    Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 (NRSV)

    It seems in recent years, gratitude has taken on new popularity. There are books on the subject; phrases like “an attitude of gratitude” are seen and heard often; there are greeting cards about being grateful and expressing gratitude and these are not just thank-you notes.

    Not having a good understanding of the difference between being thankful and gratitude, I did some research. When I looked up the definitions of gratitude and thankfulness, I realized there is no verb for gratitude. Gratitude is a noun and means “the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness.” “Thanking” is the verb. So, by being thankful we are full of gratitude, right? Not necessarily. Gratitude is more than just thanking someone for what they have done. It is a way of life or as the definition says it is a quality, a readiness.

    Originally, my sermon title was “Attitude of Gratitude” until I read a blog about gratitude. Naturally, when I looked for the same blog, I couldn’t find it, but here’s the gist of what was said.

    It takes more than an attitude of gratitude to truly be grateful. The author talked about having a great attitude for yoga. She had the clothes, the mat, the appreciation for what yoga could do for her, but that did not make her a “yogi” – that is someone who does yoga. She needed to practice yoga, to become good at it and to gain the benefits that doing yoga can provide.

    We all probably have a good attitude for gratitude, but do we practice it on a regular basis so we become good at it? And, for that matter, why should we practice it?

    In an article for the Forbes magazine website entitled “7 Scientifically Proven Benefits of Gratitude That Will Motivate You to Give Thanks Year-Round”[1], Amy Morin lists these benefits of gratitude:

    1. Gratitude opens the door to more relationships. Wouldn’t you rather be around people that appreciate you than those who constantly criticize you or others?
    2. It improves physical health. Studies show grateful people are more likely to take care of themselves.
    3. Gratitude improves psychological health by reducing a whole host of negative emotions: envy, resentment, frustration and regret.
    4. It enhances empathy and reduces aggression because grateful people experience more sensitivity and empathy.
    5. Grateful people sleep better.
    6. Gratitude improves self-esteem because grateful people are not constantly comparing themselves to others and what they lack.
    7. Gratitude increases mental strength by reducing stress and it may even help overcome trauma.

    On the United Methodist Church’s communications website, there is an article by Tricia Brown entitled “3 ways to encourage gratitude in the church.”[2]

    1. Recognize your blessings
    2. Remember your remarks
    3. Reach out to those in need

    So, is gratitude really that new of a concept? Certainly not. People of faith have been taught that “thanking” is a key component of a deep and lasting faith.

    Our first scripture speaks to “recognize your blessings.” For those of you not familiar with the story of “manna from heaven”, here’s a summary. God chooses Moses as the person who will deliver the Israelites out of Egypt, away from slavery. However, the people complain in chapter 16 of Exodus “you have brought us out into this wilderness to kill this whole assembly with hunger.”[3]

    The Israelites were thankful that they were free, but it didn’t last long and now they are hungry and complaining. God sends “bread from heaven” or manna. This is the bread of life for the Israelites. And for a while, the Israelites were satisfied. The author of the book of Numbers adds to the story by telling how, after having to eat manna for so long, the Israelites are complaining again. Read Numbers 11:4-6 

    The rabble among them had a strong craving; and the Israelites also wept again, and said, “If only we had meat to eat! We remember the fish we used to eat in Egypt for nothing, the cucumbers, the melons, the leeks, the onions, and the garlic; but now our strength is dried up, and there is nothing at all but this manna to look at.”[4]

    The Israelites didn’t recognize their blessings. They weren’t happy with what God did for them, they wanted more or they wanted to go back to when they had a variety of things to eat, not mentioning that they would have to go back to being slaves to get that variety.

    Don’t we all do that? It seems we are rarely satisfied with what we have or how much money we make or what we look like, we want things to be better, to go back to the way they were at a different time or we want tomorrow to come quickly so we can escape today. Remember when we are grateful, we reduce negative emotions.

    Here’s another way to recognize your blessings. Remember the movie “White Christmas”? There is a scene where Rosemary Clooney’s character, Betty, can’t sleep. Bing Crosby’s character, Bob, sings a song “Count Your Blessings”.

    When I’m worried and I can't sleep 
    I count my blessings instead of sheep and

    I fall asleep counting my blessings
    when my bankroll is getting small I think of when I had none at all 
    and I fall asleep counting my blessings.[5]

    Remember one of the benefits of gratitude is sleeping better? Even Irving Berlin knew that counting blessings can help.

    The second way to encourage gratitude is to “remember your remarks.” Here, the story of the thankless Israelites can help us understand what happens when we don’t remember our remarks. After Moses hears the Israelites complaining that now they want meat to eat as well, he goes to God and whines “Why have you treated your servant so badly?”[6] After Moses finishes whining to God, God provides help to deal with the people and provides quails for meat. But God warns: “The Lord will give you meat, and you shall eat. You shall eat not only one day, or two days, or five days, or ten days, or twenty days, but for a whole month—until it comes out of your nostrils and becomes loathsome to you—because you have rejected the Lord who is among you, and have wailed before him, saying, ‘Why did we ever leave Egypt?’”[7] Remember the old saying “Be careful what you ask for.” The Israelites complained and complained and were never satisfied with what God did for them.

    In her article, Tricia Brown discusses cutting out complaining and recommends the church take a 21-day complaint-free church challenge. Can you imagine? Twenty-one days of not complaining about anything. It might get really quiet around here.

    Now that we’ve seen how not to act, let’s hear what Paul writes in Colossians 3:12-14: 

    As God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience. Bear with one another and, if anyone has a complaint against another, forgive each other; just as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.[8]

    One of the benefits of gratitude is it enhances empathy and reduces aggression. What we say to each other and how we say it reflects our “attitude of gratitude.” If we constantly belittle people, criticize them and don’t appreciate them for what they do and who they are, then we are not living a grateful life. We need to appreciate one another, encourage one another and our children and youth. As we know, children learn from what they see and hear. If we want grateful children, we need to be grateful adults.

    The last way to encourage gratitude in the church is to “reach out to those in need”. We do a really good job of this as a church, but how do you do on daily basis?

    Therese Borchard, author of “9 Ways to Promote Gratitude in Your Life,” writes, “Service promotes gratitude more directly than any other path I know. Whenever I’m stuck in self-pity or depression, feeling personally victimized by the universe, the fastest way out of my head and into my heart is reaching out to someone who is in pain — especially similar pain.”

    Gratitude improves psychological health and self-esteem. By helping others, we help ourselves. You don’t have to go on a mission trip. There are a lot of ways and a lot of organizations that promote helping others. Meals on Wheels, volunteer at a hospital or senior care facility, the Crisis Center, Food Pantry, Mission of Mercy. And, if none of those work for you, be available to talk to people and share your struggles. Lifting people up in prayer is a great way to help them. They may not know you are praying for them, but they will see or feel the results. Prayer matters.

    Giving also helps promote a grateful heart. As we are told in 2 Corinthians 9:7: “Each of you must give as you have made up your mind, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.”

    So, what does practicing gratitude look like?

    First, recognize your blessings. You can keep a gratitude journal or a prayer journal. Be specific about what you are grateful for and why. You don’t have to do this every day, but you do need to do it regularly.

    Second, remember your remarks. Katherine had a great reference in her sermon last week about this very thing:

    The old saying, “sticks and stones will break my bones but words will never hurt me” is a flat-out lie, because sharp and hurtful words can also be pelted at us, lodging into our conscience and collecting in our hearts so that we start believing them and they become part of who we think we are. Hurtful words can stone us nearly to death. And if enough stones are thrown at us we can get buried by them.[9]

    Use kind words, appreciate others, write thank-you notes and not just when you get a gift for your birthday or Christmas. Yes, some people actually still write thank-you notes. I’ve received thank-you notes after giving a sermon or teaching a class. Those notes encourage me and make me feel good inside. And when you say “thank you”, say it like you mean it.

    Next, reach out to those in need – Volunteer, talk, pray, give cheerfully.

    Here’s one I would add as well: praise God. Paul puts it this way: 

    And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in the one body. And be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly; teach and admonish one another in all wisdom; and with gratitude in your hearts sing psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs to God.  And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.[10]

    Read the Psalms. Sing hymns and songs of praise (not just listening to them). These are great ways to feel gratitude. Your bulletin lists songs that are on the album “Hymns of Gratitude” by Our Daily Bread. If you sing along with these hymns, you can’t help but feel grateful for all the wonderful things God has done for you. If you prefer praise songs, I’ve included a list of praise songs that Darlene gave me for the 8:30 service.

    Practice gratitude and you will develop an attitude of gratitude that will benefit you in ways you never realized.

    [1] https://www.forbes.com/sites/amymorin/2014/11/23/7-scientifically-proven-benefits-of-gratitude-that-will-motivate-you-to-give-thanks-year-round/#69cef45d183c

    [2] http://www.umcom.org/learn/3-ways-to-encourage-gratitude-in-the-church

    [3] Exodus 16:3b (NRSV)

    [4] Numbers 11:4-6 (NRSV)

    [5] : Http://www.lyricsondemand.com/soundtracks/w/whitechristmaslyrics/countyourblessingslyrics.html

    [6] Numbers 11:11 (NRSV)

    [7] Numbers 11:18-19 (NRSV)

    [8] Colossians 3:12-14 (NRSV)

    [9] “Parable of the Sower” – sermon by Katherine Gorman, RUMC, July 16, 2017

    [10] Colossians 3:15-17 (NRSV)